My repertoire (sp?) of domains is now up to seven - se7enet, renderse7en, haloshift, scourge, evilman, orangerhino and goatporn. The last three are the single-page joke sites; that's what they were always intended to be, that's how they'll remain. Scourge is for the new game, obviously. Haloshift is largely unused right now, simply because I honestly can't think of anything to use it for - I only hold onto it because I like the name. Renderse7en is the newest, and I got it free when I signed up at Dreamhost - it's also pretty much empty at this point, though I think I'm going to do some sort of "network" thing with it, and link to all my other sites, since it's technically the primary domain on my hosting account.

So what about se7enet? If we are pretending that jaminnet and blizzardrealms never existed (which I generally try to do), se7enet is my first real site. I've used this domain longer than any other project - it's outlived at least 4 changes in my pseudo-company's name, it's been hosted by at least 4 different hosting companies, it's now up to the 10th major rewrite of the underlying site code (averaging about one rewrite every five or so months), and yet I still haven't gotten bored with it. Hell, I've been using this domain longer than I've been in a relationship with my fiancee. To me, this is simply amazing, because as we all know, I have an attention span roughly equivalent to that of a goldfish on cocaine. The fact that I've somehow managed to stick with one name, one project, one underlying vision for so long is absolutely amazing.

Se7enet has gone through four distinct "eras," I think, since its inception. At first, it wasn't even a domain, it was just a "project," a name under which I released a few shitty wallpapers ("War of the Roses" being the only one that's still around). After it was "project," I bought the domain and it became, for all intents and purposes, a proof of concept - said concept being "how can I modify UBB (.classic, as it's now known) to power a backend for an entire website." This was the second era of the name itself, but the first version (v1.0) of the site as an entity. So I worked on that for awhile, and it became readily obvious that UBB was not a backend CMS app for a very good reason: UBB was made for forums, not for CMS. So I ditched that idea, and started using Se7enet as an outlet for all the generally crappy wallpapers and other various pieces of artwork I created. This era included everything from v2.0 through v4.0 (sv20, broken, halo, and sv40). The fourth and final era started at v5.0 (halogen, which was sometime in 2002) and continues into the present. That is, it's now primarily my blog site, with art and php and some other junk thrown in as "value-added features."

The thing I'm having a hard time doing is giving up on some of the things that this site used to be. There's been one new artwork post in the last year, PHP hasn't been updated since last February, and the little Mr. Poopie! site doesn't even bloody work anymore because I totally forgot that I had to update it for the new hosting. And yet these parts of the site still feature prominently in every new siteskin, and I spend a lot of time writing the code that makes them work. Even the forums are pretty much vacant, save the except for the dozen or so people who post in the DK boards. I'm using PunBB right now, which is free but I still haven't really gotten used to - but I really want to move up to the new Infopop board whenever it gets released. And then I think to myself, if only a dozen people are using the forums, can I really justify giving Infopop another hundred or so dollars? True, it's becoming obvious by this point that PunBB is not going to grow on me, but is it really worth that much money to get a new program when only a dozen people are going to use it? If all goes well, my next game will be even more popular than my current game. Maybe my money would be better served by using my Infopop license as the primary forums for Scourge. Then I could have the general discussion section be an extra part of that site, rather than vice-versa.

Even if we take forums and everything else out of the site, there's still the blog. I can't imagine closing the site completely any time soon. So if we take everything else out, but don't close the site, the only thing that's left is the blog. But what to do with that? Continue writing my own software to run it? Maybe... but why? There are several excellent narrowly-focused but still fully-featured blog scripts out there. I could install WordPress, find some no-name blogger script on Hotscripts or the Resource Index, or even pony up $70 to get a Moveable Type license. Hell, for no more than I'd have here, I could even (God save me for saying this) just redirect the domain to a Xanga or Livejournal site, though I think if I took that route I'd at the very least use Modblog. So there are the options as far as backend is concerned, but that still leaves us with the content itself in question.

When I first started the blogging aspect of the site a couple years ago, it was mostly to do funny posts about whatever happened to pop into my mind - a so-called "E/N" site. Check back in the archives for June, 2003... around half of the posts are just random stupid shit with no apparent purpose. Then at some point it sort of evolved into the typical narcissistic "whiney little bitch" blog, wherein I almost always only posted mundane updates regarding my life that nobody really cares about. Occasionally I'd post something funny and random, or link to cool stuff I'd found on the internet, but mostly it was exactly the sort of shit that I laugh at Livejournal users for - albeit with exponentially better grammar and spelling.

Let's recap, since by this point even I am not entirely sure what I've talked about. I've been working on this post for the last hour or so, and I'm starting to confuse myself. Firstly, a lot of what's currently featured on the site is pretty worthless as far as my current direction. Secondly, the forums may or may not be worthless. Thirdly, I could just as easily be using WordPress or MoveableType or Livejournal (*shudder*). And fourthly, I've become a narcissistic little bitch.

These reasons, I believe, necessitate a so-called paradigm shift (ooh, what a fun word) in the direction of the site. Something must change. I have no idea exactly how I'm going to accomplish that change, or what it will entail. But the site has become something that is entirely different than what I ever really wanted it to be - and, truth be told, I'm honestly not even sure if I remember what I did want it to be. I need to do something about it, and I need to do it soon. To paraphrase Bilbo Baggins, the site is beginning to feel like a pat of butter spread over too much bread. I need to get back to the root of this site. The only question now is, just what in the hell is that root?

GMail announced today that they're upping the storage limit on their accounts to 2gb. Most likely this is a response to Yahoo upping their email accounts to 1gb a week or so ago. What they don't realize is that space isn't the only thing that matters... the 'G' is what matters! Google can have my babies, and Yahoo can lick my sack.

But, um, anyway, between my two Gmail accounts, I've got 100 invites available... if anyone somehow doesn't have a Gmail account yet, and wants one, let me know and I can hook you up. Now that they allow free POP3 access (which happened some months ago), there's almost no reason why you shouldn't get one.

Ok, I'd originally planned on only one thing for this post, but I saw something tonight that I just feel the need to comment on... so we'll do that first, and we'll do the main post second...

Firstly... OK, so, I've never been really into the whole skinny anorexic girl thing. I've known some skinny girls who were really hot, and there are some skinny celebrity girls who are really hot. But in general, I like for there to be at least some meat on a girl's bones. I'm not all about the 300 pound Goodyear blimps, mind you, but I'm not all about the 90 pounders either. But anyway, I saw Erika Christensen (I think that's how you spell it) on Last Call tonight. She was in Traffic, and Swimfan, and a couple other movies. And she was really freakin' hot in those. But tonight she was on Carson Daly's show, and I swear she'd gained like 20 pounds since the last time I saw her. And... um... not cool. She used to be so hot, and now she kinda blew up, and it's not cool anymore. <--- That is my sad face.

Ok, so, now we'll get to the part of the post that I'd originally planned on writing. And that part is my incomplete and mostly satirical commentary on daytime TV. I get out of class at noon, now, so I've seen a lot of daytime TV lately. So I'm going to comment on the general content of whatever shows I have enough experience to comment on, whehter that comes from actually watching the show, or just seeing numerous commercials for. So here we go...

Jerry Springer: This one typically includes two types of shows. "I fucked your (boyfriend / girlfriend), let's throw chairs at each other," or "I am a fuckup because I (wear womens' underwear / am a hooker / enjoy molesting small woodland creatures), let's throw chairs at each other." High quality viewing entertainment.

Maury Povich: Another show with two distinct types of episodes. "I slept with 16 different dudes while I was pregnant, and I think you're Shaneequa's real daddy," or "I have a heartbreaking story to justify someone in my life getting a $5000 makeover that will last approximately 20 minutes." Mildly entertaining, if only for the laugh factor when it turns out that Jamiroquai isn't really Shaneequa's real daddy.

Jenny Jones: Only one type of show here. "My best friend is a (prude / skank) and I want to give them a makeover to make them look more like a (skank / prude, respectively)." Avoid this show at all costs.

Judge Judy: Petty disputes between ex-lovers become hilarious when The Honorable Judge Judith Schindlein belittles them in front of a national audience. Excellent.

The People's Court: Petty disputes between ex-lovers become hilarious when The Honorable Judge Marilyn Milian belittles them in front of a national audience. It's highly entertaining, but it boils down to Judge Judy Minus 20 Years.

Judge Mathis: Petty disputes between (ex-lovers / landlords and tenants) become hilarious when The Honorable Judge Greg Mathis belittles them in front of a national audience. Pretty much the same thing as the last two, except this one gets even more fun when Judge Mathis sides with the white guy even though the black guy tried to gain sympathy by playing the race card.

THERE IS NO WORD IN ELVISH, ENTISH OR THE TONGUES OF MEN TO DESCIRBE THE EVILNESS OF THIS!!!! It was... like... 70 fucking degrees yesterday! And now it's fucking SNOWING!!! I live in Texas... it's almost April... it should NOT be fucking SNOWING!!! WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

I'm in World of Warcraft. Like, there's this little NPC kid named Jamin in WoW. If you go to Lakeshire in the Redridge zone (one zone east from Stormwind City), there's a little kid fishing at the end of the dock named Jamin. It totally freaked me out the first time I saw it.

Here's a super-fun story I wrote in honor of the 300th blog post here. Well, it's ID number is 300. There have been a few double-posts, etc, so it's actually probably closer to the 295th post... but, um, anyway, 300 IT IS!!!

===

UNTITLED.
A Story about Love, Friendship, and Space Aliens.
By Jamin Blount. ()

"Look at the nips on that one," Henry said. "They're the size of dinner plates!"

"Of course they're the size of dinner plates, Henry! That's what happens after you have four breast implant surgeries in three weeks."

Henry and his friend Moojonga were downloading papparazzi pictures of various celebrities and pseudo-celebrities from Google's image search. This was typical of them. They were both 14 and in the height of their maturing process. They didn't know it yet, but in about two months, Henry would spend the night at Moojonga's house and they would end up using each other for homosexual experimentation. Moojonga would then become a full-fledged nancyboy, and get jealous when Henry got a girlfriend. Eventually it would result in the deaths of 8 people at a nursing home 23 miles south of the town they lived in, but that is completely irrelevant to this story.

After a good long look at some anonymous starlet's hubcap-sized nipples, Henry and Moojonga settled into the huge leather couch to watch the movie they'd rented, some ultra-low-budget crapfest, the name of which is so unimportant and pointless that I'm leaving it out of this story. A half hour later, Moojonga got up to make popcorn and Henry fell asleep.

It was at that very minute that the hairy space aliens came crashing through the window and demanded to see the leader of Earth. Thinking it would be fun to fuck with their heads, Henry and Moojonga found the pictures of the celeb with nipples as big as a Flexible Flyer, and convinced them that she was the leader of Earth because of her ample endowments. The hairy space aliens swallowed this hook, line and sinker, and went off on their search for the tabloid queen. Little did Henry and Moojonga know that soon, the hairy space aliens would find out that they were lying about the leader of Earth, and come back for revenge.

Oh, wait, no, that's wrong. I was just talking about Henry and Moojonga getting it on a few paragraphs ago... it wouldn't really be right if they all of a sudden died now, would it? So, um, I guess the hairy space aliens never do find out that Earth's officials aren't really elected based on the size of their dirtypillows.

So, um, where was I? I guess... let's see... the aliens totally go find the celebrity, and end up incinerating her in an attempt to take over Earth. Unfortunately, since she wasn't really the leader of Earth, nobody cared. Except President George W. Bush, who had only recently been Googling for the very same images that Henry and Moojonga had found. When he heard that the starlet had been incinerated, he was totally pissed off, and said a lot of 4-letter words (since we all know the guy doesn't know how to pronounce any words longer than 4 letters). So he sent his Secret Service agents out to track down the hairy space aliens.

Agent James and Agent Blorneopolda had the luck of finding the hairy space aliens passed out behind a Dumpster in Cleveland without any pants. They apprehended the suspects, and brought them to President George W. Bush for further questioning. They also brought Henry and Moojonga in for questioning, since President George W. Bush wanted to take the boys to task for having his favorite large-nippled movie star incinerated. Of course, Henry and Moojonga denied everything, and were eventually set free because the Secret Service was unable to officially arrest them due to the covert nature of the operation. But the aliens were donated to the Du Pont Corporation, where they became excellent replacements for the animals formerly used in scientific experiments. The hairy space aliens' asexual reproduction techniques meant super-cheap, super-fast, super-legal test subject replacement. It was a Win-Win scenario. Well, for everyone except the hairy space aliens, who typically ended up dying for science at the rate of one every 45 seconds.

Epilogue:
- President George W. Bush was eventually laughed out of the White House when everyone realized what a douchebag he was. He fled to France, where he practices surrendering to an unarmed mannequin six times a day.

- Henry now works for McDonalds as a fry cook. He hopes to become Day Shift Supervisor in three weeks. He hasn't spoken to Moojonga since the nursing home incident.

- Moojonga is in prison for the rest of his natural life. Through some sick and twisted work release program, he's forced to rub old peoples' corns for six hours a day. He undergoes electroshock therapy four times per week. He doesn't know his middle name anymore.

- The woman with the planet-sized nips is still incinerated. Last we checked, her ashes had been vacuumed up by the hotel maids.

THE END.